What is a carer?

A carer is someone who takes regular, on-going care of a family member or friend who needs help due to illness, disability or age. A carer can be anyone – of either sex, or any age - and is generally unpaid. Many carers do not like the term; they see their role as a natural extension of the relationship they have with someone important to them. Others like to have a word that identifies the job they do.

Your role as carer

Many carers want to help their relative or friend and for some it can be a very rewarding experience. But it can also be a hard life. Often the responsibilities and tasks involved are extensive and if finances are tight, or the carer feels isolated or has health problems themselves, caring for another – particularly those with Parkinson’s disease - can be difficult.

There is no standard template for the role. One carer’s responsibilities will differ from another’s and will be dependent on many factors, including the abilities of the person with Parkinson's you care for, your relationship to them and on your own physical and emotional circumstances.

Some carers provide an occasional helping hand, others mainly offer emotional support, and some give full-time, practical, hands-on assistance with personal care and general activities of daily life. But, whatever your situation, it is important that you and the person you care for discuss your role and agree how best you can be of support. It is important that both sides are involved in decision-making, but roles may alter as Parkinson’s progresses, requiring both of you to adapt and adjust to circumstances.

Some find being a carer puts a strain on other relationships. So try to involve your partner, family and friends so that they do not feel squeezed out or envious of the attention you give to the person you care for.

If you find your responsibilities overwhelming, do not struggle on alone. Discuss your situation with your doctor, the Parkinson’s disease nurse or other health/social care professional involved. Talking to other carers through a Parkinson’s or carers’ group can also be very helpful. There are many useful resources for carers – see the section on further information.

Taking care of yourself

Often carers are so focused on their role they forget to look after themselves properly. Your own, personal needs may sit firmly at the bottom of your list of priorities, but as a carer it is very important that you look after your own health and well-being too. This will help you cope with the demands of caring. If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be in a fit state to take care of anyone else.

The following tips, suggested by other carers, may help you to cope mentally and physically with the challenges of caring:

• Make sure you eat a healthy, balanced diet (see the section on Diet & nutrition for advice), rest when you can and have good quality, relaxing sleep. Just as a car cannot keep going without fuel and servicing, so you cannot keep going without a good diet and adequate sleep
• Ensure that you have some ‘me’ time. Arrange for someone else to look after the person you are caring for and try to do something for yourself each day – even for just a few minutes - such as reading, meeting friends or going for a walk
• Pace yourself. Be realistic about what you can achieve and live one day at a time
• Prioritise what you have to do and admit that you’re not super-human and cannot do everything. Accept that some things have to wait. Help may also be available for some of the tasks you find hard
• Keep a positive attitude and maintain your sense of humour - this will help you cope with whatever life throws at you. Laughter is very therapeutic and enables you and the person you are caring for to keep things in perspective
• Accept that there may be times when you feel negative or overwhelmed – this is a natural reaction. If you feel like this, make sure you take advantage of any help that’s available.
• Don’t let Parkinson’s take over your entire life. Try to keep a sense of routine and normality about life and ensure you and the person you are caring for have interests that are not only about the condition
• Keep active – exercise stimulates endorphins that help to reduce stress and anxiety. If possible encourage the person you care for to remain active too. Exercising together can be enjoyable and beneficial to you both
• Try to delegate some tasks if you have family or friends who are willing to help. Seek advice from a health/social care professional about other alternatives that are available and do accept offers of help or respite care. Without some respite you may become run-down. Even a short break or outing can boost energy levels and your well-being
• Consider taking a holiday without the person you take care of, so that you have time to recharge your batteries - and do not feel guilty about doing so as this will make you much more able to cope with the challenges of being a carer
• If taking a holiday with the person you care for, plan well ahead to avoid problems (see the section on Travel for advice)
• Always ask for help sooner rather than later when you need it. Never feel ashamed that you have to ask for help
• Express your emotions and discuss anxieties or frustrations with your family, other carers or healthcare professionals. Sharing will help identify solutions and keep things in perspective. Trained counsellors can also help and offer advice on adjusting to your situation - ask your healthcare professional for counsellor contacts
• Join a local support group – not only should you be able to share experiences with like-minded people but you may also come away with practical tips to help you and the person you care for. Your local Parkinson’s or carers’ organisations should be able to advise on what is available in your area
• Check on your legal rights and what services are available to help you. This might include equipment to help you and the person you are caring for to manage personal tasks, such as bathing. In some countries, carers’ assessments and financial benefits may also be available to you.

 

 

• Site Map
• About this site
• Terms Of Use