I had always wanted to be an author and an
illustrator. To have people read a book that I had written was my dream. The
funny thing was, I didn’t get high marks for my writings at secondary school
and I think that was because I was writing what I thought the teacher wanted to
hear. I didn’t write what I wanted to say, mainly because I didn’t think I had
anything worth saying.
All through my adult years I still kept my
dream close, although it was becoming more and more faded. As I entered my
forties, my health became a problem and as a diagnosis became more and more
elusive, I needed all my strength just to function and survive each day.
However a diagnosis of Parkinson’s at 55
saw my dreams become a distant memory. I had to learn how I was going to live
with this unbelievably complex and frustrating chronic illness. I saw Michael J
Fox’s book ‘Oh Lucky Man’ and thought to myself that he must have rocks in his
head to think that having Parkinson’s was a stroke of good luck.
But time is a great healer and so is doing
volunteer work. I now felt valued. My confidence came back and so did my smile.
Life was becoming good at last.
I still
wanted to write a book and I knew now what it was going to be about –
Parkinson’s, of course.
I was still pondering how on earth to start
this book when I was asked to give an Ambassador talk to the Vietnamese
community. There would be about 60 people and they were looking forward to the
talk. ‘Oh. By the way Anne, they don’t speak English!’
I don’t speak Vietnamese but I can draw and
drawings speak all languages!
The cartoons were very successful and I
found myself drawing more and more. I finally drew a face and added blonde,
wavy hair and I immediately knew that this character felt right. I kept drawing
her over and over and each time I would see and feel how this cartoon was
becoming more and more like me; admittedly she is younger than me, a lot
younger, but we feel the same inside.
I have actually written about the things that Parkinson’s has taught me and the list continues to grow. For example, when you are told not to try doing two things at once, believe it. Last month I tried to open the car door, hold onto my cane and not drop the bags I was carrying. Well, I dropped the bags and I fell backwards into some bushes in the garden and could not get up. So I lay there and eventually a hand was extended to me and I was pulled out.
I have wonderfully supportive family and friends who will try not to notice when I fall asleep in the middle of dinner (which is why I don’t order soup), who understand my attachment to sticky ‘post-it’ notes because it’s the only way I remember things, and turn a blind eye when I miss my mouth with the fork.
Parkinson’s has given me many new skills. I am a better artist, I can get up and address an audience and I am not nervous in front of the media. Parkinson’s has taken away much from my life but it has given me back experiences and knowledge about myself that I may never have known.
When I first read the title of Michael J Fox’s book “Lucky Man!’ I thought to myself ‘what a stupid title.’
But now I understand.
Now I was drawing her doing things I had
done; Parkinson’s things, such as dropping belongings, and spilling spaghetti
sauce down the front of a new, white shirt.
Friends laughed at the drawings and soon I had quite
a collection for displays at conferences. It was suggested that I make a cartoon
book but I realised that my cartoons could illustrate the book I wanted to
write about Parkinson’s.
Then it all just fell into place. I wanted
a book that gave basic information for the newly diagnosed. It also had to be
humorous and light-hearted. A book that was also suitable for adolescents who
may want to know more about an illness that was affecting a grandparent.
There is not a lot of text but as they say,
a picture tells a thousand words and I have over 40 pictures!
I have given my draft to as many people as
possible, old and young, Parky and non-Parky, and I get such a thrill when I
see smiles and hear laughter. And when a non-Parky says that the book has given
them an understanding about the day-to-day struggles of living with Parkinson’s,
I can’t wipe the smile off my face.
June 2011. That is when I will not just be
holding a book; I will be holding a dream.
Move over Michael J Fox, because here comes
a lucky woman!
Living and Laughing with Parkinson's - written and illustrated by Anne Atkin. ISBN 978-0-9870600-3-7 Email: atkingj@aapt.net.au
